becoming my best self: Continuous Battle

Friday, July 30, 2010

Continuous Battle

So, I've lost 85+ pounds, right? People are coming up to me everyday marveling over my transformation. I have one coworker who wants me to do trainings on losing weight or motivating others to change their lives--not really sure what I'm suppose to train on but... I have conversations all the time asking how I do it or musings from folks about how releaved I must be to have a handle on my weight or "we need to celebrate", like I've accomplished something, like I've licked my obesity. One thing I've come to realize, obesity is like alcoholism or any other addiction. You have to put in the work every single day to make sure that you stay "sober". Tonight, was a perfect reminder for me that I'm in a continuous battle with obesity.

I've been having a pretty good week. I've had some pretty rough parenting moments but today was a great parenting day and I decided to treat myself and Bboy to a night out at the Little Tree House...a nice playhouse and "cafe" for little ones and their hangerson.

Anyway, I had a mid afternoon snack in my lunch bag which I traded in for a protein bar, which I thought would just be easier in the environment (and I must say in all honesty would be more enjoyable to eat around all the pizza and ice cream that would surround me.) I bought two bars at CVS because I just didn't know what flavor I wanted. Well, long story short I ate the one in the "cafe" and decided to eat the other one for dinner.

Two things: 1.) I ate the second one because I was tired and didn't feel like heating up my real dinner 2.) I also just wanted it. It tasted good. Neither one is helpful to me. Well, I'll tell you one thing. I'm definitely paying for my "cheat" because those bars have a lot of sugar alcohol in them, which is a sugar substitute that is used in a lot of diet foods but which also produces a lot of gas when consumed in larger doses! BUBBLE BUBBLE! UGGHHHH!

Ok, so tonight is over and all I can do is work on tomorrow and the next day. Tomorrow I'm back to 6 Week Body Makeover cooking and protien bars will remain on the shelf for actual emergencies!